But I was TOLD Things Would Get Easier…

A month ago, this was me…

Freedom

I spent each day for a week doing EXACTLY what I wanted, when I wanted to do it. I loved every second.

Fast forward to now. When I do NOTHING I want to do, ALL of the time. I do NOT love every second of it. I’m not complaining though. I understand that this is what it’s like this when you have kids. But really? Maybe my Costa Rica trip spoiled me, or maybe I’m right and these kids are really out to get me. I’m in the final stages of a weekend alone with the kids while Nick retaliates with a guys’ ski trip. While it hasn’t been nearly as bad as I expected, I AM DONE!! Seriously. My throat hurts, and I can tell you, it isn’t because I’m sick. If I have to yell “STOP FIGHTING!” one more time…

Let’s just say it’s been a long weekend without Nick’s back-up.

Yesterday I was at my mother’s house pawning “craft-time” off on her. I played Candy Crush on my phone while she busted out the glitter glue and paint with the kids. I’ve given up on trying to be the crafty mom. Screw crafts. In my opinion, it’s true that good moms do crafts with their kids. But Smart moms take them to grandma’s house. But I digress… My mom looked at me and said, “WOW, you have 3 KIDS now.” What she meant was that now I no longer have 2 kids and a baby. 2 kids and a baby wasn’t nearly as difficult as 3 talking-back, not listening, doing whatever the hell they please KIDS! It made me remember a conversation I had a couple of weeks ago, with a new mom. I promised her it would get easier. HA! I’m so full of shit. What I should have told her was that yes, soon you will master this new baby stage and be totally comfortable. But then you know what, it moves to the next level. A harder level. If you continue to have more babies, yes, you will catch on faster, become immune to sleep deprivation and get into the groove of babies. BUT, once they all start growing up…You’re screwed. Really. I think back on the “baby” days and I think, damn, what the hell was I even complaining about? Now I have to deal with attitude. I have to deal with disciplining them. I have to make sure they don’t turn into homicidal maniacs. Now I get to deal with school, kids at school and the behaviours they pick up from those kids. As an example, Jack came home from school singing about “ball-sacks in your mouth.” What the hell is that all about? Do I even want to know?? Suddenly, I’m having to think about parenting, and not just meeting their base needs. Yes, I still feed them, bathe them, and occasionally wipe a few butts, but now… Now I have to put thought into how I’m going to make sure they grow up to be functioning adults. I have to figure out how to keep them off of the Jerry Springer Show!! It’s crazy overwhelming, and I’d argue completely unfair. As if the first two years of insomnia and ass-wiping wasn’t enough work… Now I have to use the brain that has been turned to mush from too much Treehouse? Uh-oh.

I have heard so many different tricks of the trade when it comes to kids. Most of it has been complete crap. After all, I can recall a few people telling me that it gets easier the more kids you have. Yeah. I call bullshit on that one! I take all of the advice I’ve heard, and I pour myself a glass of wine and laugh. Everyone has different kids, different lives, and way different experiences. No one knows what the hell they are doing, so I’m not going to pretend I do. Instead, I’ll just try my best, and hope that none of my kids turn into crazed lunatics, thieves, or stars of ridiculous reality TV shows. So, to my dear friend with the new baby. Yes, it’s hard but it doesn’t last forever. If you’re ever in a stage where you think you can’t take another day…Just wait a week, and BAM! a whole new level to master. You’ll figure it out, we all do. Hang in there.

As for me… Right now I’ll remind myself to enjoy these kids, while they’re kids…. I’m already getting comments about the hell that the teen years bring. Hooray for parenting!!

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One thought on “But I was TOLD Things Would Get Easier…

  1. I’m still amazed you’re even a mom. I remember the days when we were like, KIDS? Bahahaha! NEVER. Baaarrrrffff! And then you grew up and had three and it was super nutty for a while. But now you get that control and perfection are an illusion, and are totally in the groove of surviving one day at a time—as you make meals from scratch, reno the house, and work a business with Nick. It may feel like a hot mess sometimes, but you got this, and with a great sense of humour. I’m so proud of you!

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