Elf on the Shelf Goes on Vacation

I’m aware that everyone in the world has an Elf on the Shelf. I’m also aware that I was supposed to start it almost 2 weeks ago. However, I’m somewhat adverse to popular trends, and I’m also kinda lazy. I’ve seen so many pictures posted online of all the clever things parents are doing with their elves. They are having snowball fights, building lego castles and writing messages out of cheerios. I wonder if I’ll ever be able to keep up. But I’ve gone and done it. Now I must be creative and WOW my children every morning when they wake up. Good thing I only have 10 nights to worry about. Lazy mom rule #1: Start shit late. Less work and the kids are none the wiser.

So, maybe you’re wondering why? Why did she buy an elf if she doesn’t really want to participate? My reasons for buying our own evil little elf are pretty simple. I’m feeling guilty that we aren’t feeling the Christmas spirit this year. We’ve kinda skipped Christmas and all the jazz that comes with it because of our upcoming escape vacation. So, since I’ve been so entertained by reading about the fun and misery of being an “elf mom”, I’ve decided that now is a good time to introduce one to our family. 

Natalie’s first reaction was to laugh at the sight of the elf and say, “That’s not real.” Jack is another story. His mind is abuzz with all things Elf. Since our first introduction was brief (I had about 5 minutes to explain what the package was before rushing off to piano lessons), Jack spent the first few hours asking his dad all about it. His father had no idea about this thing, so he had no answers to help Jack out. Jack became frantic. “He can’t go upstairs can he? He stays in that box right?” I think he’s somewhat petrified of this elf. I will admit, if my mom brought home a box with a magical elf spy in it, I’d be scared too. He does have a creepy Chucky doll-esq look to him. Jack seemed to warm up to the idea of the elf once I had the chance to read him the story and explain that he is a good and happy elf, who won’t bludgeon him to death in his sleep. When the story was over and we were discussing why he’s going to be staying with us in Florida, Jack got really upset. He was really nervous about having this elf around and I think I know why. When I said that he watches everything you do, and reports back to Santa, Jack lost his mind. His first reaction: “No one likes a tattletale!” True story, Jack. BUT that’s how it’s going to work, so you and your friends better be good or the elf rats you out, and you get ZIP for Christmas. When our discussion was over, Jack asked me to put him back in the box. He isn’t ready to deal with that elf yet, and I don’t blame him. So, I’ll pack him in my suitcase and bust him out on Saturday night to keep the unruly kids in line while on vacation. Here’s hoping!

 

This is for Jack. Don’t be afraid my son, he’s really a nice elf… as long as you’re a good boy.

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Other ideas for our elf:

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I mentioned taking a picture of the elf on Jack while he was sleeping. His father abruptly said “NO!!” I guess that IS a little too mean, even for me.

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This one is a favourite of mine. I’m rude and crude, so it’s right up my alley. 

 

Let the games begin!!

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